You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
The uberlube is also flammable
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
