Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
