I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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