I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize