remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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