Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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