Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
