at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
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