Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
