eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Randomize
