Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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