I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
