thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
