We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I was not drunk enough for that final.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
