i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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