I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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