you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Randomize
