Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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