Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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