Kiss
Puke
I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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