great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
