The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
