i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
