i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
