shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
