i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
