I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
