using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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