I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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