i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I want to be your penis for a week.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
