look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
