it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize