There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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