I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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