they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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