Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
