You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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