My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
