I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
