don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
