you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
how does that bad decision feel?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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