Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
you're hired as official boob wrangler
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