i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
