How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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