They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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