Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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