Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
