I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
