I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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