White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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